Disaster on Legs

So, I haven't blogged in a really long time. I was actually thinking that I subconsciously gave up on it.
But I guess not.
I think I'm in the mood to blog now simply because I had a horrible day. This week has just been horrible, but I have maintained optimism until now.

I had a meltdown in math class today. My old friends from my harder, freshman year days came to visit - my tears.
I have realized that though I have been through child therapy when I was younger because I cried too much (& this really isn't an exaggeration - you should have seen me during elementary school) I still have a slight problem. Or not? Maybe it's completely natural.

The thing is, I cry when I am frustrated.
I cry when I am angry.
I cry when no one understands me.
Rarely do I cry when I'm sad. I just mope around a little.
It reminds me of the times of my childhood when I pretended for the longest time that I had constant dry eyes, which caused the sudden tears during class. No one but me knew the truth.
I absoultely hate that feeling when I am suddenly overwhelmed, my throat tightens, and I have no control. I feel weak.

So, anyways, I cried during Algebra 2/Trig class. Have I mentioned I'm a junior in high school?

Maybe I'm going about this the wrong way. Maybe this is healthy because I'm not doing something else to vent over my emotions. I'm not doing drugs, I'm not getting drunk, I'm not isolating myself and, most importantly, I'm not giving up.

Math has always been my hardest subject. Always. But there's still time. I can still get a good grade on the class. My dream college is counting on me. I can, because I must.

There's nothing I can really do about my crying situation. I don't consider myself really sensitive, just a human being who copes differently than most people.